Wednesday, October 29, 2014

What Scares Me Most About Getting Married

I'm about as independent as they come. I've lived alone since after college and moved from College Station, Texas to Chicago, to Washington D.C., to Tyler, Texas to Sarasota, Florida without knowing a single soul in most of those places. I was not all scared but rather excited about new places and experiences. I've gotten so used to doing everything for myself that I can't think of much I need someone else to do for me. Well, I'm not exactly skilled at major home repairs, BUT I have been spending an increasing amount of time at Home Depot and have an incredibly skilled handyman.

So when it comes to getting married in a few months, what scares me most (and scares is really too strong of a word) involves losing a little of my independence, not committing to one person for the rest of my life. That doesn't scare me in the least; I'm as committed as I am independent. Much like deciding on my career at age 5 and never wavering, once I knew Max was the one, and I knew pretty quickly, I've never had any doubts.

Now, moving in together and changing my last name, those are the hard parts for me. Although I'm a card-carrying member of the Beyonce "Who run the world? Girls!" Club, I'm also pretty traditional, so I never considered not legally changing my name. It especially makes sense once you have children so that everyone in the family shares the same name. But that doesn't make it any easier. It's not that I just love my last name. It's not particularly poetic and no one can spell or pronounce it correctly. It's just that it's part of me, and suddenly becoming someone else one day is hard to swallow.

I read this article and could totally relate to the author's story. (By the way, I recommend you read it. It's written by a seemingly sane, intelligent woman with logical points.) She mentioned how she almost broke off her engagement because of a fight over changing her last name. While I could never imagine that, I did recall a little tiff I had with my fiance regarding that very subject. I was signing a receipt, and he asked me if I had practiced my Winitz signature. I said, "no, and after we get married, I plan to sign my name the exact same way I always have."

As you can see from the photo, my signature doesn't look anymore like Wielgus than it does Winitz. And as we were having this discussion, I was sitting there thinking: look, I'm already changing my name, now I have to change my second-nature, scribble of a signature, too? I think it's hard for the person not changing their name, and in some ways their identity, to relate to the person who is going through that process. Especially for those of us who are a little bit older getting married, we've lived many adult years with our names and giving it up at the drop of a hat isn't easy.

As the wedding gets closer, I've started to think about ALL of the things that bear my last name. For example, when I signed onto my computer to write this blog post, even the welcome screen says "Hayley Wielgus." Do I have to change that? Do I wait until I get a new computer? How does all of this work? Not only is it a little psychologically difficult, this is a time-consuming task!

Now...softening the blow is the fact that I'm keeping my maiden name professionally. I know I'm not a famous network reporter, but the television news world is small and now that I've started to establish myself as Hayley Wielgus, I think it's best to maintain my "brand." Plus, having a future husband who also works in TV, I think it's best for us to have different on-air last names, since we're not exactly trying to market ourselves as a package deal.

I know I'm not completely alone in my apprehensions about changing my name, because several women have shared with me how difficult it was for them. But it can be hard to express those thoughts, especially with our future spouses, because, well, men can be a little sensitive about these things. (Sorry, guys!) I think, for some, it challenges their masculinity.

Hate to break it to some in the male population, but not all women are sitting around writing Mrs. Whoever in bubbly cursive and dotting the Is with hearts, like we did in seventh grade. Instead some of us are mourning the loss of Ms. Maiden Name. Our future spouses may mistakenly think it's a reflection of our feelings about marriage or about joining together as a family. I can't speak for anyone else, but for me, that couldn't be further from the truth. I'm beyond excited to marry Max and to start our own little family. I just know introducing myself as Hayley Winitz is going to take a little practice, so bear with me!

Friday, October 24, 2014

Friday Five XI

This candle was burning at a restaurant, and I instantly became obsessed! It smells incredible-- warm, rich and just a little sweet. It could work as a great holiday scent but definitley isn't so Christmas-y that you couldn't burn it year-round. These candles are made in Tampa from all-natural soy wax. There are so many other scents I would like to try as well.

Fun and functional, infuse a cup of loose leaf tea in this lovely mug. It's available in two other colors as well. By the way, this is just one of the neat things I found on the Museum of Modern Art (MoMA) website that would make great holiday gifts. I also found some great stuff on The Met online store.

I splurged a little on this sports bra for Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Twenty percent of this purchase goes to the Lynne Cohen Foundation to fight ovarian and breast cancer. 

Leopard print + Sperrys = preppy perfection!

THIS IS THE BEST ROUND BRUSH I HAVE EVER OWNED. Period. I picked this up on a whim on clearance at Ulta. Have you ever had a stylist dry your hair and you sit there wondering, how does he/she just grab all that hair and whip it around so easily? This brush allows you to do that! It's lightweight, smoothing, moves through the hair easily without tangling and really cuts down on drying time because of the ceramic coating. My hair is getting longer, so I was looking for a larger-barrel brush, so I went with the 53 mm. I was worried I wouldn't be able to curl under the ends because of the size, but nope, it actually works great for that. All around fantastic!

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Birchbox Review: September

September Birchbox

1. ChapStick® Dual-Ended Hydration Lock Moisturize & Renew -- As much as I love higher-end samples, I like when I get a Birchbox Find, which means drugstore product. It's nice to know it's budget friendly, and if I really like it, I can just pick it up at Walgreens or Target. (Sorry Birchbox shop.)

This product doesn't really differ from any other ChapStick I've used before, but I like it. I don't notice a huge difference between the "Moisturize" and the "Renew" side, other than that the Renew side seems to fade faster. The biggest drawback is that neither side has SPF, so I use this at night before I go to bed.

2. dr. brandt® pores no more® vacuum cleaner™  -- Once this mask sets after about a minute, it forms a dry, white, almost powdery film. My face felt tight while I had it on, which really didn't bother me. I'm not sure if it really removed any blackheads, but I do think it helps tighten pores, at least temporarily. If you have dry skin, this might not be the best for you, unless you really moisturize after you use it. I enjoy it because my skin tends to be normal/slightly oily, so I like products that leave a matte finish on my face.

3.  Jouer Anti-Aging Moisture Primer -- I still don't understand how to judge a primer. Is it doing what it's supposed to be doing? I have no idea. Maybe that's because I wear powder foundation, not liquid, so a primer is probably not as essential. This one goes on like a very light lotion, but dries pretty quickly without any greasy finish. It provides a smooth canvas for my makeup, but I can't really tell if it makes it adhere better or stay on longer. Apparently it contains peptides, antioxidants and caffeine, so it's good to know it's doing double duty on top of priming the skin for makeup.

4.  Skin&Co Roma SICILIAN LIGHT™ SERUM Vitamin C Brightening Face Serum -- I love some antioxidant Vitamin C in my beauty products. It can help repair UV damage, including discoloration and dark spots. However, I believe there are other products on the market with more powerful levels of vitamin C than this one. This serum is more like a light lotion and goes on nicely. I do notice a little bit of a glow to my complexion when I use this but nothing dramatic. It also has what I would call a grandma-like scent. Not terrible, but not my favorite.

5. Juicy Couture Viva La Juicy Gold Couture -- I normally don't like Juicy perfumes because they're a little strong for me and just not the type of scents I prefer. But, I really like this one because it's sweeter and I love sweet-smelling scents. But it's not too sweet or overpowering, which is great.

5. Noir Cosmetics Long-Wear Eyeliner -- I don't wear black eyeliner, so I didn't sample this so that I can pass it on to someone who will use it.

Overall, nothing in the September box really stood out as something I would buy, but I like the products enough to use them until I run out of the sample. However, I am excited about the products in my October box, especially the rosemary shower gel. Cannot get enough of that spa-like, invigorating scent!

October Birchbox

Thursday, October 9, 2014

(Healthy) Treat Thursday

I'm not sure if this is actually a treat, but it's alliteration and I couldn't think of a better title. And to me, smoothies are treats; I've always loved them. I can't cook at all, but I think I'm pretty darn good at making smoothies. Although I don't know if one can actually be bad at making smoothies since it's really easy, but I do find mine to be as good if not better than many I buy at juice bars and smoothie places and MUCH cheaper. 

I usually prefer creamy smoothies, but I came up with this concoction and I'm really liking it. Here are the ingredients to what I'll call Fruity Green:

I've been snacking on the frozen mango while I make this smoothie and it is SO good. I think when everyone went through that mango craze of making salsas and chutneys out of it, I forgot how tasty it is all on its own. I like it better that way, and there's something really great about it frozen.

For this smoothie I put about a cup or less (I don't really measure) of coconut water, one banana and about a handful or so of the fruit and spinach. If you use frozen fruit, you don't even need ice.  I recommend pouring the coconut water in first to help everything blend more smoothly. Don't worry if it looks a little weird when it first starts blending; you probably need to stop it once or twice and stir before blending again.

This smoothie is packed with antioxidants, and you can't even taste the spinach. Also, you can mix and match the ingredients to make other smoothies. My standby is a blueberry banana smoothie with milk and ground flaxseed.

Fruity Green Smoothie:
-About 3/4 - 1 cup coconut water
-1 banana
-Handful+ frozen mango
-Handful+ frozen berries
-Handful+ spinach

Pour coconut water into blender first. Break banana into pieces, add fruit and spinach. Blend for about 10 seconds, stop and stir ingredients if needed. Blend again for about a minute until smooth.

Friday, October 3, 2014

Occupied in October

I live by my iPhone calendar; I actually don't know what I would do if my phone data got wiped out. Actually, I look at it so much that I've basically memorized every event and appointment I have coming up. Glancing at it today I saw so many of those little dots and realized October is shaping up to be a very busy month! Here's what I have on tap:

I'm taking my little sis' from Big Brothers Big Sisters to the One Direction concert at Raymond James Stadium in Tampa. All I can say is, pray I survive the sea of teenybopper madness.

Saturday, October 4th:
State Aquatics 2012 & 2013

I'll be heading to the east coast of Florida to coach my Special Olympics swimmers at the state aquatics meet. Go Sarasota! This is always quite an experience. There's a spaghetti dinner and dance at Sebastian High School, and we stay at the defunct, former Spring Training facility of the L.A. Dodgers. It's not a luxury vacation, but it's always fun and watching the swimmers get their medals is incredibly rewarding!

Monday, October 6th: 
I'll be making a guest appearance on our new local talk show on ABC 7, Suncoast View. Since October is of course Breast Cancer Awareness Month, I'll be sharing some of the events happening in our area, several of which I'll be attending! Speaking of...

Tuesday, October 7th:
On my dinner break between the 6 and 11 p.m. newscasts, I'll be popping over to Libby's Cafe + Bar in Sarasota to be a celebrity server. The event benefits the Center for Building Hope, which offers support programs to Suncoast residents with cancer and their families. Get tickets here!

Wednesday, October 8th:
This is the second year I've served on the committee for Key to the Cure, an event at Saks Fifth Avenue stores across the country. Ours raises money for women's cancer programs at Sarasota Memorial Hospital. This year's event will be the grand opening for Saks at the brand new Mall at University Town Center. The committee is privileged to have a sneak peek of the new store, and we get to have lunch at the restaurant, Sophie's. The Sarasota store is only the second in the country to have a restaurant; the other is Chicago.

Thursday, October 9th:
Happy 30th birthday, Max! Yes, I'm marrying a younger man ;)

Tuesday, October 14th:
 Key to the Cure 2013

The aforementioned Key to the Cure! I took the day off so I could fully enjoy the party and not have to rush back to work for the 11 p.m. newscast. Tickets still available - join us for a great event.

Thursday, October 16th:
 Back to Suncoast View! This time I'll be filling in as a co-host for the entire show. It's the closest I'll get to co-hosting The Today Show with Kathie Lee & Hoda.

Saturday, October 18th: 
Making Strides 2103

I'll be emceeing the Making Strides Against Breast Cancer Walk at the Sarasota Polo Grounds in Lakewood Ranch!

Sunday, October 19th:
Celebrating the one year anniversary of our engagement! I still feel like the luckiest girl in the world.

Wednesday, October 29th:
Kickoff for next year's Women in a Changing World Panel benefiting the Boys & Girls Clubs of Sarasota County. The actual event is coming up next March, and it is truly one of my favorite functions. Suncoast friends, it's unlike any fundraiser you've attended, not to be missed!

Friday, October 31st:
Happy Halloween!